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My Mother Went to Prison and She Took Me with Her

My Mother Went to Prison and She Took Me with Her

At 77 years young, my mother goes by herself into a Nashville women’s prison every week. While home for a visit recently, she took me with her.  She armed herself with several things:  Bibles, a stack of slightly used paperback devotional books, which she acquires from anyone who save them for her, and a Bible study lesson she wrote herself. We were ready to go.

After ten years in this particular facility, the people know her well.  After going through security, we walked through a series of hallways and many heavy electronically locked doors until we arrived in the multi-purpose room. It was a cool room with cinderblock walls, a cement floor and plastic chairs.  She banged on the window. The Correctional Officer yelled out “BIBLE STUDY”, and the inmates started coming.

Some of the ladies knew her well, others she met for the first time. Some ladies brought their Bibles and were well familiar with them, others were not. Some were chatty and spoke about what God was doing in their lives, some never said a word. Some she’ll see back again, some she’ll never see again.

One thing they had in common: they listened attentively and hung on her every word.  One lady leaned over to me and with a smile said, “I love Miss Lyn. I‘ve learned so much from her.”  She started by distributing New Testaments, devotional materials, paperback puzzle books and pens.  To say they were grateful to receive even one of these items is an understatement.  The lesson was on the parables in Luke 15. It concentrated on the prodigal son.  The Bible study was easy enough for newcomers to understand, yet it was meaty enough for those more mature in their faith. Discussion questions helped the ladies apply the lesson to their own lives. The Gospel was shared and I was asked to lead them in a prayer to accept Christ.

There are now more than 100,000 women behind bars in America. One third are incarcerated for drug offenses. The female prison population is increasing at double the rate of men.  Many of these women struggle with substance abuse, mental illness, and histories of physical and sexual abuse. The toll on women, girls, and their families is devastating. I believe one of the reasons my mother has so much success is due to the fact that she sees these women as real people.

Another way she reaches these women is by giving them a copy of the book Redeeming LoveRedeeming Love by Francine Rivers is a historical romance novel set in the 1850s Gold Rush in California. The story is inspired by the book of Hosea from the Bible. Its central theme is the redeeming love of God towards sinners.  My mother has distributed so many copies of this book she has lost count. She brings one every week and asks God who to give it to that day. The inmates love the book as it shows them that God loves them and there is hope.  He desires to redeem regardless of the situation and sinful past.

My parents were introduced to prison ministry 30 years ago.  Only God knows the profound affect their efforts have made over the years.  Hats off to Mom and the countless others who minister in prisons.  In the book of Matthew, Jesus said to those on His right, those blessed of His Father, “Inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world… for I was in prison and you came to Me…to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.

Summer Survival Tips for Young Moms

Summer Survival Tips for Young Moms

No homework! Stay up late! Sleep late! Pajamas till noon!  The first week or two of summer for families can come as a relief.  I recall when my three children were younger.  We went into relaxation mode!  It was a reward for the demanding schedules of school, study and extra-curricular activities.   But I have to confess, our relaxation mode quickly turned into laziness, poor habits and frustration.

That’s when I learned about BALANCE.   Balance implies harmony, stability, calmness.

Here are some things we did in our home to stay balanced:

Set a schedule:   While it’s OK to stay up a little late and be flexible, a lack of general routine results in chaos and poor behavior. Even in the summer, kids need regular bed times, a time to get dressed and afternoon naps. A daily afternoon quiet time for older children to go to their rooms for reading and rest gives space for everyone to regroup to enjoy the rest of the day.  Post your schedule in the kitchen. Schedules set boundaries for a balanced lifestyle.

Make personal goals for the summer:  Help each child set three goals for the summer.  Here are some suggestions:  learn to swim, practice an instrument, read five books, memorize a passage of Scripture or perhaps get help on a particular academic struggle like multiplication tables. Take yellow construction paper and cut out a sun.  Write the three goals on the sun and tape it to the refrigerator.  Goals should be measurable, specific and attainable. Include an action plan. Goals should help your children grow, preparing them for the fall.  Good summer goals help kids stay focused and be productive but without causing pressure.

Balance your summer calendar:  Schedule vacations, church camps, VBS, etc. Make a list of local attractions and destinations to visit. Be sure to schedule time to rest and play. Summer should be a time to refresh and regroup.  Our culture encourages families to be over scheduled. Don’t get to the end of the summer and feel like you need a break.

Set a budget: Summertime brings added expenses in terms of vacations, entertainment, groceries and back-to-school expenses. This causes added stress. Recognize in advance that these expenses come every year and plan ahead for them.

Don’t forget about yourself:  If you are balanced, you’ll be a better parent. Prioritize your devotional life and spiritual growth. Simplify, have fun and enjoy the time with your children! Summers with your children at home don’t last forever.  Give yourself permission to do something for yourself, too.

Don’t just survive the summer!  Create memories to last a lifetime!

Ecclesiastes 3:1   “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heave

Who does this stuff?

Who does this stuff?

It was September, 1983.  I accepted Christ as a young single adult. In my quest to grow in my new found faith, someone recommended the book, Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster.  I have to admit, I was overwhelmed at the time, but the book gave me valuable teaching on how to grow in the Christian faith.  Fast forward exactly 30 years, and I find myself reading this book once again, but this time carefully examining the truths and teaching it to a group of passionate ladies from my home church.

Considered one of the best modern books ever written on Christian spirituality, Celebration of Discipline is described by Christianity Today as one of the 10 best books of the 20th century.  The book explores 12 disciplines, separated into three movements which form a balanced Christian life. The inward disciplines offer avenues for personal evaluation and change. The outward disciplines prepare us to make the world a better place. The corporate disciplines bring us nearer to God and one another.

The book teaches about solitude, Christian meditation, fervent prayer, private confession, living in simplicity and fasting (you know, that’s where you don’t eat).   Seriously, how many of us really do this stuff?  Foster writes, “The desperate need today is not for a greater number of intelligent people, or gifted people, but for deep people.”   He states, “Today there is an abysmal ignorance of the most simple and practical aspects of nearly all the classic spiritual disciplines.”  We simply don’t know how to explore the inner life.  The result is superficiality, lack of substance and lack of God’s power.

Foster emphasizes that inner transformation is God’s work, and God has given us the disciplines of the spiritual life as a means of placing ourselves before God, so He can transform us. It’s about adjusting ourselves, so that we can receive from God instead of the popular Christian notion in our culture that God has to adjust Himself to our wants and needs. The goal is not to simply modify our behavior but to experience transformation from the inside out.  Foster offers a wealth of examples and practical advice on how we can incorporate these disciplines into our daily life.  Here is the key:  the disciplines are not to be viewed as dull drudgery but experienced in joy and freedom.

I challenge you this summer to add Celebration of Discipline to your summer reading list. Take your time reading it and put into practice what you learn. Challenge yourself to new insights and practices and allow God to stretch you. Try something new in your spiritual life. The disciplines are for every one of us. “All we need to get started is a longing after God”.

Need a Night Out, Mom?

Need a Night Out, Mom?

You’ve just found your daughter using the wall instead of paper for her artwork.  Your son is playing in the toilet. Your house is trashed, and you feel like you haven’t had a shower in a week. I think all of us Moms can identify with feeling overwhelmed, falling short of what’s expected of us and on the verge of failing in this journey of parenthood.

This Mother’s Day, my husband took me to see Sony Picture’s MOMS’ NIGHT OUT, an inspirational and laugh-out-loud family comedy depicting the joys and nightmares of raising children.  Exit polls reveal audience reactions: 82 percent of moviegoers say, yes, they’d definitely recommend MOMS’ NIGHT OUT. A million-plus people are talking about it on Facebook.  Among females aged 35-49, MOMS’ NIGHT OUT received an A- Cinema Score.

Appropriate for the whole family, the movie identified with real life circumstances and feelings of those living in the trenches of raising young children and teenagers.  As a pastor’s wife myself, one of my favorite characters was Sondra, the pastor’s wife, played by Patricia Heaton.  As the movie progresses, her mask is taken off, and we see a real, genuine Christian woman, raising her own teenage daughter.

As a mother who is approaching the empty nest, here’s what I took away from the movie:

  1. Take a break and have fun. Get out the sparkly high heels and go out to a nice dinner with your friends.  Having fun and enjoying a change of scenery helps to keep our perspective. It helps us to distinguish between the most important and the trivial.
  2. Don’t expect perfection from yourself or anyone else.   Cut yourself some slack. We all make mistakes and so do our kids. Raising kids is like cooking a meal in a crockpot not a microwave. It’s a journey that involves much prayer and patience as we all seek to grow to become more like Jesus.
  3. In the midst of the chaos, enjoy every minute with your children.  Seasons in parenting come and go.  One minute you are changing diapers, and the next minute you’re turning to walk out of that freshman dorm room. They won’t live at home forever, so take every minute to appreciate them and invest in their lives.

So, when you’re feeling overwhelmed, ill-equipped or perhaps
underappreciated, remember, motherhood IS important and one of the greatest gifts on earth. “You are a masterpiece, and that’s enough.”

Photo credit: Sony Pictures